The Things I Want To Share
I've been struggling with a massive amount of writers' block this past week. No, it's not for lack of things to share. At present, I have over 200 article titles stubbed out as ideas. They just sit there waiting for me. Waiting for me to take the time, to prioritize them, and to birth them into the world.
The problem I'm bumping up against is a fear that these topics are so important, but that I won't (or more cripplingly, can't) do them justice. That if I write and publish them, they will fall flat on you and I won't inspire you but a fraction as much as they inspire me. That's my fear.
Here's just one example.
My wife recently shared with me this insanely powerful podcast episode featuring Rich Roll and Zach Bush. It moved me to tears so many times I lost count. I will be forever changed from this conversation. One specific example would be my perspective on how I view the pain experienced during a person's final moments on this earth.
In sharing this, many of you may try and go into it, hoping you will have a similar experience and yet feel nothing. That is what I'm most terrified about. That I will put myself out there and find out that those I care about don't feel the same way or that they cannot relate in that experience. The feeling of being disconnected is part of my bull shit belief system (e.g., a BS BS) that sometimes stops me from opening up and sharing what truly matters.
What I wanted to write today was a post on the people that are inspiring AF. I have dozens if not hundreds of people that I owe an immense debt of gratitude. They have believed in me. They have inspired me. They have shaped my thoughts and beliefs. They have made me want to be a better person, a better husband, friend, colleague, whatever whatever, and so on, and so on.
Maybe I'll finally work up the courage to share what seems so easy and yet feels so hard to do. I fear that in sharing my list, we may find that there is no overlap between us and where would that leave us? Would we still be part of the same tribe?
I'm clearly overthinking this, but it's an odd feeling to want to share but feel such a massive amount of resistance. I decide to go with that because that is where I am at today, and perhaps in some odd way, you may find it to be a much more relatable experience.
Thanks, as always, for listening.
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About Rick Manelius
Quick Stats: CTO of Contact Mapping. Author of Winning the Lottery Within. Graduated from MIT in '03 (BS) and '09 (PhD). Life hacker and peak performance enthusiast. This blog is my experiment in creative writing, self-expression, and sharing what I've learned along my journey. For more information, read my full bio here or contact me.