Death and Forced Reflection
In the past week, three people I know have experienced unexpected deaths with close family members. And so it feels important to stop and reflect on that.
I turned 44 years old last month, and joked with my friends and family that I'm officially 50% through my life. I even created one of those "Your Life in Weeks" charts (here’s mine) as a powerful reminder that life, while it is long, it also goes fast.
Still, this past week was a reminder that humans make plans, and god laughs.
I'll spare the details, but I learned of a two year old that experienced a freak accident requiring emergency surgery only to die a few days later.
And then a surprise suicide experienced by a friend's sister.
And then another person on a conference call on Monday took his life the following day.
Ok. I got the message.
I know that there are no guarantees in life, yet I'll be the first admit I take my remaining 44 years as a given.
What arrogance!
Sure it's highly probably my lifestyle and health regiment will give me the best odds, but so what? I've also had a few near death experiences (crashing through frozen ice in a pond, almost falling over a railing on a fire escape). I've made it through unscathed each time, but a few more inches the wrong direction and who knows? One of my high school classmates wasn't so lucky, flipping over a balcony rail. That didn't happen me, but it could have.
BTW, this isn't meant to be a downer.
Every time tragedy strikes, it motivates me to double down and make the most of what time I have. I want to live old enough to see my grand kids, but what if that doesn't happen? Well then I'm going to make the most of my time with my wife, my kids, my friends, my work. Everything.
My wife and I joke that we feel like we're trying to squeeze multiple lifetimes into one. Maybe I've always just felt the pressure that time is short, and I want to experience life to the full. And yet still there are times where I procrastinate instead of take the next bold leap.
I have no clean way to wrap up this article. nor do I have a single profound insight to leave you with. If I was sitting with you, I would just look you dead in the eyes and remind you, emphatically, that time is short... and to appreciate every fucking moment you have in this wonderful life.